Friends of the Family

Group Work With Families

● What Happens in the Group?

The group, which meets on Tuesday and Friday mornings, is facilitated by a qualified social worker, but the content of the group discussion is decided by the participants. There is no 'parenting-class' content, but the women learn from one another, and support each other in their learning. Together, the women are able to talk while their children are cared for by qualified and experienced staff and volunteers. We have a 'Confidentiality' rule, so that the group is a safe place to talk about difficulties in relationships with family members or friends, and about concerns for their children’s development. Again and again women will say that one of the most important experiences in the group is knowing that they will not be judged. The principle is of acceptance and respect, so any challenges made by group members are on the basis of their own experience of the struggle to be a good parent. As a result, negative patterns of behaviour do change. It happens through the knowledge that the group is a safe place in which to be vulnerable.

● What About the Children?

The children are cared for by qualified and experienced staff and volunteers, who have all had enhanced checks with the Criminal Records Bureau. The play is child led and we maintain a high adult: child ratio, so that the children are helped to develop the attention necessary to learn from play and to practise skills in social relationship. We aim to support them to become confident communicators.

We record observations of the children each session, and these records are shared with the parents, so that achievements can be celebrated, and any areas of concern are identified and carefully monitored and documented.

Our Play Leader has said:

“We endeavour to provide a positive, secure, happy and varied experience for each child. Each is valued for who they are and given as much attention and approval as we are able. It is always a privilege and delight to be with them and to be able to observe their development. We work closely with the parents and have much respect and admiration for how well they cope in what are often difficult circumstances.”

● What do Group Members say about Friends of the Family?

In their own words, this is what some of the group members wrote for inclusion in our most recent Annual Report:

“I have been coming to Friends of the Family for 1 year and 2 months now. When I initially started to come I was suffering from post-natal depression and although it is still ongoing, coming to the group has made me realise a lot of what I have felt is normal, and taught me how to deal with my feelings, and with my children. Although I can have real ups and downs, Friends of the Family has made the world of difference both to me and our family as a whole. It is such a help to know there are people who are interested in us. It has made more difference than words can say.”

and

“Attending the Friends of the Family group has been a personal journey for me. I was first referred by my Health Visitor who thought the group would be a great support to me as I was coping as a single mother and dealing with other problems and family issues. Gill came to visit me at home beforehand and I found her very pleasant to talk to and I could confide in her my troubles. I am quite shy and was extremely nervous the first time I went to the group. It was really difficult for me to communicate with people, and after 2 visits I decided not to return as I was finding it too tough. Thankfully for me, Gill kept in touch. Various phone calls and text messages were exchanged between us. Gill told me the group was there if I ever needed it. She gave me time, and when I again felt ready, I returned to the group.
The second time around I found it a lot easier and everyone there made me feel at ease. I found that staff and group members are so kind, and really care about the welfare of the other members and children. I now feel confident and able to express my feelings and discuss issues that I would otherwise keep locked up inside. Friends of the Family is proving to be a real help to me. I can’t praise them enough.”

and

“I have been coming to Friends of the Family for roughly 6 months. After looking at the project from a distance for a while I finally plucked up the courage to attend. Initially I had an informal chat with Gill who I found to be friendly and understanding. I had my hang-ups about coming to the group as I can be quite cautious of people, especially groups of women. It turned out all the women are lovely and I have even managed to share a few worries (so much so I have considered counselling). This goes to show what a friendly and trusting atmosphere there is here. My daughter is always happy to come to Friends of the Family and enjoys playing with the play helpers, with the toys and with her new little friends. The helpers are hardworking, non-judgemental and sincere. We are always made to feel welcome.”

● Additional Information

We have a shared lunch each month, an outing in the summer, a party at Christmas, and we celebrate birthdays. There is a small charge (currently 75p a session) for refreshments, but this is waived when necessary.

● What if I think Friends of the Family could help me or someone I know?

Phone us on 01962 864466 or e-mail us on friendsofthefamily@btinternet.com and we will contact you as soon as possible.